Fear On The Horizon

Most Christians, worldwide, have heard about the fearless Hurricane Katrina. This storm made a devastating intrusion on my hometown, Monday, August 29, 2005. It intruded on my family, my career, my friends, my neighbors, my emotions, my life. I'd like to use Katrina as an example of explaining how mental storms can follow a similar pattern of negative force within us and at the same time build a stronger foundation with God while rebuilding your life. As Christians we all know that when we rely on Jesus as our main architectural consultant in our lives - He will restore us without fail - in ALL ways.

I remember the Friday afternoon before Katrina made landfall that following Monday... At my office, my co-worker, who is a Christian as well as a very dear friend, and I were trying to wrap things up for the day. We worked in the shipping department, in a lone office, away from the administration building, which left us out of the gossip link and the company's social circle (which was a blessing).

Anyway, as it went that Friday afternoon, my friend asked if I had heard any latest news on the hurricane in the Gulf. As she was saying this she reached for her phone and began to find a hotel north of us "just in case". I giggled and said, "That storm is not coming here, Deb! It's going toward the Florida panhandle". She said she wasn't taking any chances because she was responsible for her elderly parents and wanted to make sure she secured a room somewhere. Her next remark to me, without taking her eyes off her phone was, "I knew a Katrina once and she was nothin' nice!" I got tickled and became amused at her serious and negative response toward the name Katrina. Was it the storm she feared or the woman she referred to?... I wonder...
She had a mental storm of fear approaching, too. I could sense it just by knowing her. She was a single mom with three kids and elderly parents to take care of. I decided to pull up the weather station on the net to see how the weather was going to look for the weekend and to ease her fears and just for the sake of knowing whether to plan outdoor activities with my family, if the weather permitted. Yeah, right...
It was then that I took notice that Hurricane Katrina had shifted about 150 miles west of her original projection and was barreling straight toward New Orleans! It just happened that as soon as this new warning was posted I was led to read it within minutes!

Right then and there this Christian felt the first winds of my own mental storm blowing in... FEAR!

Being a native of New Orleans you learn quite young about the geographic of this city. Beside the actual location on a map you also grow up familiar with the knowledge of it being referenced to as - a bowl, below sea level, surrounded by water, a disaster waiting to happen... The mighty Mississippi River flows through it, lakes cradle it, canals drain it and industrial canals contribute to its economy. There is water in some form within a hundred mile circumference of this city. And that fed my mental storm of FEAR as soon as my eyeballs settled on the new projected path of Katrina that Friday afternoon...

I immediately made reservations at a hotel in Denham Springs, LA, close to my younger sister and her family. Something kept telling me to book a room (ummm... could that "something" been the Holy Spirit?... you'll see). It's just a good thing I followed the lead to book the room even though my sister had opened her home to my little family - my husband, my son, my 90 year old father-in-law, my sister-in-law and me.

Upon arriving home from work that Friday evening my husband wasn't too alarmed. He even made a goofy face when I told him I had booked a room. "It may change course", he said. "Then it may not." I answered. As I was tracking Katrina my own mental storm of fear was slowly tracking me. My mind wandered into so many "what ifs" that I could barely function. Yes, me the savvy Christian, the one that remains focused on reality in the moment was breaking down inside. My own storm, a storm of fear was indeed brewing...

The next morning, Saturday, I took my little boy to our cousin's birthday party. The party started at noon and by 2:00 the adults were buzzing about "the storm". Leave? Not leave? That was the topic of the party. Not only me but every one else at the party was starting to show signs of fear at the approaching storm. We hadn't had a blast since Hurricane Betsy. I remember that storm, too! We stayed for Betsy... hunched under the kitchen table for hours while the roof blew to pieces.

I told my son it was time to leave the party as I knew deep inside an evacuation was on the horizon. We would not stay for this one. I had a child to protect.

When we got home my husband was already planning his strategy of boarding the windows on the house with the wood he already had on hand. To quote him, "Just in case". As it turned out - he was short of lumber - just in case he needed it... of course. He dreaded going to buy more as everyone in our surrounding area was already preparing and the lines at the store were UNBELIEVEABLE! But - he went anyway. As he parked in the parking lot he ran into a fellow that had some scrap pieces of plywood and boards in a trailer hooked onto the back of his truck. They exchanged a couple of "Hi, how's it going?" and discussed the 'what do you think?'s' about Katrina's aim at us. And wouldn't you know it - before my husband reached the mile long lumber line the stranger offered his trailer of scrap wood to him for $20.00! No lines, no hassles!

Hammers were banging wildly throughout the neighborhood by Saturday evening and into the night. My husband was right there, in sync, with the melody of preparation. I was inside packing, hoping and praying for the best, and fearing the worst! I only brought a couple of changes of clothes for each of us. I took my few little jewelry pieces along with my Mother's diary from when she was a child of fifteen. I took a few of her little possessions that she held onto all of her life (they fit into a gallon zip lock bag). These few items had that meant the world to her have now become family heirlooms. I took only a few pictures with us. I packed my bible, our insurance papers and that's about it. Although Katrina was steadily maintaining her path toward us we had not dreamed that our stay away from home would be more than a couple of days...

Saturday, August 28th. We finished up the last preparations on the house and headed to my father-in-laws' house. My sister-in-law is his caretaker and neither was capable of boarding windows. It was close to 10:00 P.M. Saturday night before we finished up there. My husband told them both to be ready to roll at 3:00 A.M. the next morning. As fear would have it - I didn't sleep at all that night...

FEAR, FEAR EVERYWHERE!

Remember the hotel room I spoke of booking earlier?... I had my hand on the phone to cancel the reservation at 3 P.M. Sunday afternoon when the phone literally rang as I was about to key in the first number. It was my cousin back home - they were ordered to evacuate immediately and she and her family had nowhere to go. I told her to take the hotel room I had booked - it was still available.God was looking out for us in every way!

At nightfall, Sunday night, we piled on sofa's, occupied every bed, and some of us were on the floor on air mattresses (that would be my husband and I) and solemnly waited for the morning... Monday, August 29th. It was about 5:00 A.M. when the wind woke me. The hall light leading to the living room where we slept started to flicker then went out. I thought to myself, 'Great - the electricity just went out! How are we to know where the storm is?!! What if it shifted further west and we are now directly in the path!!!' Fear settled a little deeper and cramped my logical thoughts - such as get a battery operated radio - the lights came back on. By this time my husband woke up and we turned the TV on. The winds were getting a little stronger as the early morning went on then about 9:00 A.M. we lost power in Denham Springs. It would not come back on for 3 days. Some areas had power restored much sooner.

On Tuesday afternoon my brother-in-law told all of us to pack up a few things that we would go across town to his friend's house that had electricity. So we did. The heat was horrendous and we were concerned for my father-in-law. It was hot!My father-in-law giggled when I murmured that we were like a pack of gypsies. Going to an area that had electricity and a TV after being more than 36 hours without them began to unleash fear of a different form. When we turned the TV on to the news we finally got to see with our own eyes what was happening back home. We sat in horror as we watched our city drowning!

My mind took off on a path of its own... wondering in fear - what is left of our home?... Do I have to tell you that I prayed?... I prayed hard. Its one thing to think that there may be nothing left when you go back home but it hits harder when a child comes up and asks, "Is our house gone?"... When my niece asked me that the only thing I could say was, "I don't think so. I think we'll be okay, no matter what, we just have to trust God that everything will be alright - no matter." My heart broke for her as I knew my fear as an adult - but as a child! But at that time - there was no way of knowing what we had left - if anything.

The next as the events of back home kept unfolding my fear stayed deep inside. I knew if I kept on with this disgusting spirit of fear hanging over me that I would not be worth anything - to myself or my family. I had to let it go.I had to trust God and start where He wanted us to start - either start over - or where we left off...

Needless to say, we left and went to Raceland, LA to the home of my husband's brother. Gypsies we were. As we continued to watch one episode after another unravel back home I had to keep my fear in check. Evacuate the fear! Don't let it linger!Shake it and deal with the situation by the guidance and faith in God. God is bigger than Katrina - she is no match for Him.

A week after Katrina we managed to get back home to see our area. City officials gave us a certain amount of time to get into our homes (considering you were not in areas with 8 feet of water), check things, get a few things and get out - not to return again for 3 weeks. Upon arrival into our subdivision we went through the military check proving we did live in that area.

From the outside we saw that our house had roof damage and wind damaged. We did not have electricity so upon entry every room was dark, damp and musky. Every window was boarded so we couldn't see within inches without flashlights. Black mold had already started growing on the living room carpet where the rain and wind came down the chimney of the fireplace. We had a several leaks in the ceiling but no flooding on any grand scale whatsoever. Considering the fact that we have friends and relatives only 2 miles away that had 2 feet of water in their homes - we were so grateful to find our home as it was.

God took care of us - as always. As we left our house, cleared the military check, and weaved through and around debris my fears turned to tears. The aftermath of the storm was depressing. Things were changed.

After we road out Hurricane Rita a couple of weeks later in Raceland - we headed for home again. This time to stay. Life around us was not the same as we left it. Damaged homes, friends we could not find nor get in touch with. Emotionally, we came back quite differently than when we left - but we made it. By the mercy of Jesus we made it!

Our prayers and compassion extend to those less fortunate. Those whose losses were beyond anyone's control or imagination. Still, God does not leave us. We cannot question His ways - His ways are NOT our ways (that is something to be grateful for). He is a NEVER changing God. He is true to His word and His love goes beyond our mortal understanding.

Take the following example of how the Lord gave His promise to Jehosphaphat, King of Judah, when the Moabites, the Ammonites, and some Meunites came to battle against him. Jehosphaphat had a mental storm of FEAR inside as he knew he could not win against the likes of this multitude heading toward him and his people:

Jehoshaphat was frightened, and he hastened to consult the Lord...2 Chronicles 20:3

All Judah was standing before the Lord, with their little ones, their wives, and their young sons. 2 Chronicles 20:13

...and He said: "Listen, all of Judah, inhabitants of Jerusalem, and King Jehosphaphat! The Lord says to you:'DO NOT FEAR OR LOSE HEART AT THE SIGHT OF THIS VAST MULTITIUDE, FOR THE BATTLE IS NOT YOURS BUT GOD'S.' "2 Chronicles 20:15

You will not have to fight in this encounter. Take your places, stand firm, and see how the Lord will be with you to deliver you, Judah and Jerusalem. Do not fear or lose heart. Tomorrow go out to meet them and the Lord will be with you.2 Chronicles 20:17

And they did. They followed the Lord's instructions and were delivered from battle and their fear was wiped clean by God Himself. He loves us all and will not forsake us.

Love has no room for fear; rather, perfect love casts out all fear. And since fear has to do with punishment, love is not yet perfect in one who is afraid.1 John 4:18

The Spirit God has given us is no cowardly spirit, but rather one that makes us strong, loving, and wise.2 Timothy 1:7

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